‘Everybody expects you to be better’: Princess of Wales’ revealing comments on cancer diagnosis, recovery

The Princess of Wales has spoken of the pressure of putting on a “brave face” through cancer treatment and recovery, where “everybody expects you to be better”.

Princess Catherine, who is continuing her return to public life while in remission from cancer, said there was an expectation that patients “crack on, get back to normal”.

Catherine, Princess of Wales, has spoken candidly of her cancer recovery journey and the pressure to put on a “brave face”.Credit: Getty Images

But she added that the “very scary, very daunting experience” did not end with the conclusion of treatment, with patients needing to take time to find their “new normal”.

The deeply personal words from the princess came as she met patients at a cancer wellbeing centre at Colchester Hospital, helping to plant roses in a garden designed to help visitors find peace.

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The princess is gradually returning to work and recently cancelled an appearance at Royal Ascot.

Describing a cancer diagnosis as “life-changing” and the treatment and recovery a “rollercoaster”, the princess spoke of the importance of a holistic “mind, body and spirit” approach.

She repeatedly emphasised the importance of patients and their families being able to find support through their illness, saying it was too often difficult to reach.

Speaking to patients and volunteers inside the centre, she said: “There is a whole phase when you finish your treatment, everybody expects you to be better – go! But that’s not the case at all.”

“You put on a sort of brave face, stoicism through treatment. Treatment’s done, then it’s like, ‘I can crack on, get back to normal’, but actually, the phase afterwards is really difficult.

“You’re not necessarily under the clinical team any longer, but you’re not able to function normally at home as you perhaps once used to.

Despite heavy rain, the Princess of Wales stopped to take selfies and talk with staff and visitors.Credit: Getty Images

“And actually, someone to help talk you through that, show you and guide you through that sort of phase that comes after treatment, I think, is really valuable.

The centre provides therapy, community groups and holistic treatments, including reflexology.

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The princess, speaking to therapist Amanda Green during a walkabout in heavy rain afterwards, disclosed that she had not yet tried reflexology but had received acupuncture.

The discussions were the princess’ most personal and extensive insights into her experience.

“It’s life-changing for anyone,” she said. “Through first diagnosis or post-treatment and things like that, it is a life-changing experience – both for the patient, but also for the families as well.

“And actually, it sometimes goes unrecognised. You don’t necessarily – particularly when it’s the first time [of diagnosis] – appreciate how much impact it is going to have.

“You have to find your new normal and that takes time … and it’s a rollercoaster, it’s not one smooth plane, which you expect it to be. But the reality is it’s not, you go through hard times.

“And to have a place like this to have the support network, through creativity and singing or gardening, whatever it might be, is so valuable and it’s great this community has it.

“It would be great if lots of communities had this kind of support.”

Speaking to patients, including those whose cancer had returned and one who had lost his husband to cancer, the princess asked how the centre had helped them.

“That first-time diagnosis is a very scary journey,” she said, referring to the benefits of having an on-site hospital support network where many volunteers have had cancer themselves and survived. Many newly diagnosed patients at Colchester Hospital now visit the centre immediately for counselling and advice.

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“To feel a sense of hope and positivity [from speaking to people who have already been through it] is such a positive thing in what is otherwise a very scary and daunting experience,” the princess said.

She added that “science has told us that the mind, body and spirit experience is so important”, asking if the hospital’s clinical team gave any feedback about how the wellness centre had affected patients.

After around an hour at the centre, Princess Catherine moved into the Royal Horticultural Society’s Wellbeing Garden at Colchester Hospital, where she helped plant roses named after her.

Getting her hands dirty and asking if she could do a bit more work, the princess dug alongside Adam Frost, the television garden designer, telling him she was feeling “good” and pleased to be able to work outside.

In the pouring rain, as the engagement overran by about 30 minutes, she told hospital staff and patients who had waited outside to see her: “I’m just washing my hands – I’ll be back.”

The Princess of Wales literally got her hands dirty planting roses in the wellbeing garden. The visit coincides with the donation of 50 Catherine’s Roses, named in her honour.Credit: Getty Images

She then undertook a walkabout, posing for selfies and group photographs in between asking people about their day.

Kensington Palace said the princess was there to “celebrate the incredible healing power of nature and raise awareness of the important role that spending time in nature plays in bringing us joy and supporting our mental, physical and spiritual wellbeing”.

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The princess arrived at Colchester Hospital with little fanfare, walking through the public garden as one mother told her little girl: “That’s a real-life princess, there!”

Meeting staff inside, the princess praised the hospital’s continuity of care and the network of volunteers, which saw former patients returning to help others.

“It must make a difference to people coming in here, in knowing there are people who have been through it too,” she said. “Even through the hard times and loss, there is a sense of hope and community through a space like this.”

“From personal experience,” the princess added, holistic support during recovery “was that lifeline you need post-treatment, when you’re not receiving continuous care”.

‘A mind, body and spirit perspective’

The centre includes support groups as well as massage, reflexology, a family practitioner, advice on wig fittings, and a “cancer choir”.

The Princess of Wales posed with staff during her visit. She praised the continuity of care the hospital provided.Credit: Getty Images

“It’s looking at treatment and recovery as complementary,” the princess said. “Looking at it from a mind, body and spirit perspective really matters. It’s great, well done.”

“Having gone through it myself,” she added, she could now better understand the challenges of finding support.

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“Some people don’t have access and don’t necessarily know how this system can help them,” she said. “Joining the dots for patients and families … while there might be fantastic community work going on, if it’s bitty and there isn’t one place and one body bringing these support networks together, it’s hard to reach out, particularly when you’re vulnerable. I can see it has such a transformative effect.”

Hearing about the centre’s choir, the princess added: “Having these creative avenues is really fantastic.”

Princess Catherine carried a mug of tea as she spoke to patients and volunteers, joking that “as a parent, you know you’ll keep losing your cup of tea” otherwise.

“It’s not just the patients, it’s the family too,” she said. “It’s not just the cancer care, treatment, healing, it’s about the whole person – mind, body and spirit. We know now that all those three dimensions matter to the recovery journey.”

The wellbeing garden at Colchester Hospital, which opened in July 2024, is intended to be a “relaxing and restorative space for NHS staff, patients and visitors” and hosts activities for those in or visiting the hospital.

The garden is taking part in research for the RHS’s Blueprint for Wellbeing Gardens, which will launch in spring next year.

The visit came with a donation of 50 Catherine’s Rose plants, named for the princess by the RHS, with funds from sales going to the Royal Marsden Cancer Charity.

A total of 500 Catherine’s Rose plants will be donated to well-being and community gardens across the UK this summer, including Maggie’s gardens for people affected by cancer, East Anglia’s Children’s Hospices and Horatio’s Gardens for those living with spinal injuries.

Meanwhile, Queen Camilla has hailed the “brilliant” Maggie’s cancer care centres while on a visit in Kirkcaldy, Scotland.

The Queen, 77, is president of Maggie’s and spent the morning visiting one of its 24 centres while her daughter-in-law spoke candidly about her “rollercoaster” experience after cancer treatment.

During the visit, Camilla spoke about the “brilliant” care that Maggie’s centres offered cancer patients and their families, adding that “there is something so special about them”.

Queen Camilla visiting Maggie’s in Scotland.Credit: Getty Images

The Queen also met with the charity’s founder and chief executive, Dame Laura Lee. Speaking afterwards, Dame Laura said: “It is always a joy to welcome her majesty to one of our centres, especially one she has never been to before.

“As always, she was incredibly generous with her time and listened closely to our centre visitors as they shared their stories. We are so grateful for her continued support.”

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As part of the engagement, Camilla also met people living with cancer, similarly to her husband, the King, who is receiving ongoing treatment.

Maggie’s provides free psychological, emotional and practical support for anyone living with the disease, as well as their family and friends.

The Queen was also greeted on Wednesday by Sarah Brown, wife of former prime minister Gordon Brown, and Kirsty Wark, who are honorary patrons of the charity.

The Telegraph, London

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