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The enemy of your enemy is supposed to be your friend. But what happens when you also hate your enemy’s enemy, just as much as the enemy?
Fans of the NRL’s nine NSW-based teams find themselves surrounded by enemies, fuelled by animus and contempt, and unsure of where to direct it.
The Brisbane Broncos face the Melbourne Storm in Sunday’s grand final, and Sydney is not sure how to feel about it.
This is, of course, not the first time the NRL’s showpiece has been an out-of-town affair. It is, however, the first time in a long time that it’s been so hard to pick a side, if yours isn’t involved.
In 2017, it was easy; the Cowboys were the obvious choice for neutrals over the Storm. Same in the all-Queensland showdown of 2015; nobody wanted to see the Broncos deny the Cowboys their first premiership, and thank heavens it didn’t happen.
But this? The Broncos, the embodiment of everything NSW hates about Queensland - or the Storm, who are not only Victorian, but have been good forever, not to mention their, let’s say, chequered ethical history? It’s like having to pick between going to the dentist or being audited. Either way, it’s going to feel deeply uncomfortable and spiritually unsettling.
Broncos supporter Mova-Jean Howlett is a big fan of Reece Walsh.Credit: Steven Siewert
Hence the slightly off-kilter vibes on Thursday afternoon at the NRL Fan Fest at the Circular Quay Overseas Passenger Terminal, as hundreds of punters assembled to catch a glimpse of the two grand final teams and hear them speak pearls of wisdom, like how it was important to take the week “day by day”, the concept of being “connected” as a playing group, and the importance of “sticking to the game plan”.
Sitting front and centre was Peter V’landys and Andrew Abdo, the king of the NRL and his Game of Thrones-style hand, proudly surveying the brutes being paraded. And around them, an audio-visual spectacular: sponsor activations being activated, content being created by content creators, at least one toilet lid being held proudly aloft in Reece Walsh’s honour, a grown man in a horse mask pleading with Michael Maguire for a photo, another in elaborate Bulldogs face paint, and a group of kids yelling things about “aura” through the fence at the players.
Mingling with the sweet, unmistakable scent of redemption, being freshly prepared by the unseen rugby league gods, there was confusion - and we’re not talking about the dozen or so tourists wandering through, clueless to their surroundings, happily sipping on the free cans of lemon and orange-flavoured Solo Zero being handed out.
Of those present who knew what rugby league is, about half the people in the crowd had a dog in the fight. Most of them were Broncos fans, presumably on annual leave. Fair enough.
Everyone else was happy to be there, but still sorting through their emotions.
“It’s a hate-watch,” declared Will Edwards, 21, wearing a Bulldogs jersey. His brother, Angus, 15, was in a NSW Origin shirt. For blokes like these, there are no good options.
“I hate both teams. It’s Queensland versus Queensland in my book.”
Rugby league fan, Will Edwards“I hate both teams. It’s Queensland versus Queensland in my book, because you look at the Melbourne team and half of the Maroons come from there. I’m going to be rooting for the Sydney Roosters in the NRLW - and then I might just switch it off.”
At least Parramatta Eels fan Joe Essey had an excuse.
Storm star Harry Grant mingles with fans in Sydney on Thursday.Credit: Steven Siewert
“My wife is a Queenslander,” he said.
“She’s a Brisbane Broncos supporter. But if she wasn’t, I’d probably have to decide who I dislike more. Which is probably the Storm, because they’re always in it. I want somebody different to win.”
The crowd had largely dispersed before the always-awkward joint press conference involving the two coaches, which was opened by Sports Minister Steve Kamper and a rhetorical question for the ages.
“How good’s rugby league?” he said.
Let the madness ensue.
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