Billion-dollar R360 competition is on its way, but with no tribes attached nobody will care

3 days ago 5

So, here we go again.

In the wake of the news that the global rebel rugby competition R360 has reportedly received over a billion dollars of funding and will launch in October of next year, the parallels are obvious.

For it, of course, brings to mind other such moments when the card table was upturned, all the cards went flying, and everything was disrupted until all the cards started to land and – pausing only to snarl at each other – everyone leaned forward to see what the new world order looked like.

The most obvious examples in these parts, of course, is Kerry Packer’s World Series cricket in the mid-70s, followed by the launch of the World Rugby Corporation and Super League in April 1995. In more recent times, globally, the obvious parallel is LIV Golf.

Details remain scant, but it looks likely to have 12 city-based teams.

As one who wrote a book, The Rugby War, on the whole affair of the World Rugby Corporation – essentially the last attempt at a global rebel comp, before Murdoch money into the establishment won the day – allow me to assert a few verities:

The competition won’t work, at least not financially. As discussed, rugby devotees will absolutely lean in to watch men in green and gold dressed go hard against those dressed all in black, or with a rose, or a thistle, or a springbok etc – because they are our tribes, our history, our team – that passion in rugby is strictly non-transferrable.
The fact that it won’t work, however, does not mean it won’t get off the ground. As witnessed by LIV Golf, when an absurdity has enough billions behind it, games actually take place, and are indeed broadcast – it’s just that no one truly cares. No one who truly understands the ethos of rugby will be putting big money to this, expecting to make a profit.

Melbourne Storm fullback Ryan Papenhuyzen met with R360 officials about his future.

Those who do sign up will never say the truth: “Sorry, too much money on offer. I couldn’t resist. TAXI!” Rather, stand by for endless versions of: “I want to help the game grow, blah, blah, blah.”
Against that, all threats of banning from the establishment – “If you sign with R360, you can never come back to the NRL or Super Rugby, and are banned for life,” won’t make much difference. Threats like that are always made, and never amount to much in the long haul. After the cards have fallen where they may, the best players always still have a gig somewhere.
Whatever the new format is, it will come with endless bells and whistles attached, claiming to revolutionise the sport. Such was most certainly the case with Super League, and they were so successful in their marketing schtick, a lot of us really thought a whole new game was coming. When it arrived, it looked a lot like ... rugby league.

This, when it comes, will look a lot like union. But without the history, there will be no tribe attached.

The Australian Border Force pokes some fun at All Blacks great Richie McCaw.

Border Force’s warning for Kiwis

Here was a nice Facebook post from the Australian Border Force, on Monday, which came complete with a photo of Richie McCaw: “Hey New Zealand – if you’re coming to Perth for the Bledisloe Cup this week, please make sure you enter our SmartGates directly through the front, facing the camera – not from the side. We know you have a history of entering from the side ...”

More Monday madness

Every. Freaking. Year.

One team or another disgraces itself with its Mad Monday antics. This year, it was the Geelong Cats, straight after being thumped by the Brisbane Lions in the AFL grand final. It is all too tedious to go into too deeply, but it involved such things as Max Holmes dressing up like AFL journalistic icon Caroline Wilson, and Patrick Dangerfield and Bailey Smith doing a Brokeback Mountain take-off with the implication that losing a grand final turned you gay. (Laugh? LAUGH? I thought I’d never start.)

This is from grown men.

Not for the first or last time, Kane Cornes nailed it.

“At some point in time, with the issues that there has been in and around dress-ups, clubs have just got to say, hey, you know what? It’s not book week. We’re not in year five. Let’s just turn up in a shirt and some jeans and have a good day, a few quiet beers, and celebrate a grand final loss where we got smashed in the second half because we don’t need to dress up and make ourselves look like fools. I thought they embarrassed themselves.”

In response, Geelong announced they would discontinue Mad Monday in its current form, to which one of the Twitterati replied: “‘In this current form’ I assume means private location, no media and no phones, and the same old s---.”

Trump’s America stains Ryder Cup

The appalling behaviour of the American crowd at the Ryder Cup? It simply beggars belief that a golf crowd could behave in that vulgar, boorish, bullying manner – hurling insults and epithets at both the European players, and even their partners.

So vulgar were some of the comments to Rory McIlroy about his wife Erica and marriage, it is a serious wonder he was able to keep his rough equanimity – beyond telling them to “F--- off!” – without braining them.

One of my spies was in the crowd, and tells me that following McIlroy and fellow Irishman Shane Lowry on Friday, comments included: “Rory you’re a c---”, “Has Erica met Amanda?” (referring to an alleged affair), “Erica come here and drive my balls” and “Shane you fat pig – oink for me”.

Welcome to Trump’s America, where such bullying boorishness starts at the very top.

The great Tom Watson, an eight-time major champion and former Ryder Cup captain, said after the disgrace: “I’d like to apologise for the rude and mean-spirited behaviour from our American crowd at Bethpage. As a former player, captain, and as an American, I am ashamed of what happened.”

It took some Australians to lighten things up, with a dozen there from Sydney. On Sunday, when it was obvious that the Americans were indeed going to lose, they were holding up signs including “50% Tariff on European Points”, “Make Scotty Great Again” and “STOP THE COUNT!”

The pièce de résistance though, was one bloke holding up a Kleenex box, beside a large sign which said: “Free Team USA Tissues”.

How did they react?

“The vast majority of the Americans,” one of them, Anthony Collins, said, “were very good sports and played along.”

The others, not so much ...

What they said

Rory McIlroy to a particularly vulgar Americans in the Ryder Cup crowd: “Shut the f--- up!”

Rory McIlroy on the poor fan behaviour: “I don’t think we should ever accept that in golf. I think golf should be held to a higher standard than what was seen out there this week. Golf has the ability to unite people. Golf teaches you very good life lessons. It teaches you etiquette. It teaches you how to play by the rules. It teaches you how to respect people. So no, this should not be what is acceptable in the Ryder Cup.”

Mark Nawaqanitawase on why he will be returning to rugby union after next season: “The cool thing about union is you can travel the world. Travelling the world and just meeting different cultures and different people ... is an experience I wish all people could experience.”

Nice writing in the SMH from Dan Walsh and Billie Eder: “The Broncos’ blood runs hot in key moments, the Panthers – ice-cold.”

Phil Gould on his sudden heart problems, which have seen him hospitalised. “My regular blood tests this week, showed up something else that needed investigation. Basically, I came in to change the tyres, and they found a problem with the engine. Go figure.”

Geelong’s Patrick Dangerfield, after the grand final defeat to Brisbane: “It’s a ruthless sport. It’s the best sport in the world – I think we can all agree on that. But you do risk the devastation, but it’s worth putting yourself out there and giving it a crack.”

Geelong captain Patrick Dangerfield embraces the Lions’ Cam Rayner after the Cats’ grand final loss.

Cats coach Chris Scott to the fans:“You’re better than I am. If I had my way, or in a weak moment, I’d still be in bed with the doona pulled over my head. Even when we frustrate you, you stick with us. We really appreciate it.”

Cameron Munster on his manager and media pundit Braith Anasta talking him up: “But the more you think about it during the week, the more you play the game in your head, and you forget why you play the game. It’s some nice words from Braith, but at the same time he’s my manager, so he’s probably just blowing wind up my arse.”

Nathan Cleary on not winning the title for the first time since 2020: “I just haven’t felt that in a while, so I definitely don’t want this feeling again ... going into the off-season now, it’s like an opportunity to grow even more and come back stronger.”

Kane Cornes is not a fan of Geelong’s Mad Monday dress up: “They’ve owned this space for a long time, but at some point, you have just got to say, it’s not book week, we’re not in year five.”

James Slipper on hanging it up for the Wallabies after tonight, two years before the home World Cup: “It feels like the right time for me to step away from Test rugby. There’s a number of good young props coming through who will need time in the saddle leading into what’s going to be an unbelievable experience.”

Lewis Dodd on it not working out at the Rabbitohs after only playing six games of a three-year, $2 million deal:“Not a day goes by that I felt I made the wrong decision.” Yes, I know – who would?

Team of the Week

England. Won the Women’s Rugby World Cup. We’re hosting the next one!

Wallabies. Take on the All Blacks on Saturday in Perth, after coming within an ace of beating them – down just 26-24 last week at Eden Park, with nine minutes to go – last week.

Queensland. After winning the AFL flag and the Origin, while hosting the 2032 Olympics, both the Broncos men’s and women’s teams are tomorrow contesting the NRL grand final. Please make it stop.

James Slipper. Played his 150th test match last week at Eden Park.

West Indies. When is it rock bottom for them? In a T20 they were bowled out for 83 by – wait for it – WAIT FOR IT, I SAID – Nepal.

RIP Brother Bob Wallace, 87. The longtime stalwart of Australian Schoolboys Rugby passed away last week. His funeral on Thursday was packed, and included dozens of his former charges, including a huge contingent from the famous 1977 Australian Schoolboys. Well done, oh good and faithful servant of the game.

Twitter: @Peter_Fitz