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The people who hold it all together tend to break hardest when they finally stop.
Being the “strong one” becomes expected of them — it’s easier to keep going than admit overwhelm. Emotional labour, caregiving, household logistics, unresolved trauma, invisible responsibility… all of it accumulates quietly until it becomes physically impossible to maintain.
Younger Australians are feeling it too, with three in four workers under 25 quietly cracking, compared with 35.7 per cent of those over 55, according to the ‘2025 Australia Workplace Report’. It’s a cross-generational pressure cooker: adults stretched thin by responsibility, younger workers strained by uncertainty.
“For people who have substance use issues, complex relationships or childhood trauma, Christmas can be a time where the increased stress, expectations and family contact become overwhelming or lead to crisis,” explains Sutton. “It’s also a time of evaluation, offering a new year and an opportunity to focus on holistic recovery, addressing physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.”
Coping culture and the slide into numbing
When pressure builds and emotional space disappears, people turn to coping mechanisms without realising it: another drink, another late-night email, another overloaded week.
“At Byron Private, we see people who have turned to alcohol, food or over-functioning because these behaviours give quick relief from stress or uncomfortable emotions,” Meighan says. “High stress dulls self-awareness. Coping becomes automatic before they recognise the long-term toll.”
The distinction between “coping” and “numbing” is subtle but crucial.
“Coping is intentional and restorative, such as a walk, a conversation, journaling, boundaries,” she explains. “Numbing is avoidance. It may feel good temporarily but doesn’t address the underlying issue.”
December is the perfect social enabler: indulgence without guilt, excess framed as normal, emotional load wrapped in celebrations and primed for collapse.
Recognising the patterns early can prevent escalation. “Awareness is the foundation for change,” explains Kim. Credit: Byron Private
When stopping makes everything catch up
The crash isn’t weakness; it’s biology. Many people run on stress hormones for most of the year. When the external pressure lifts, the body finally releases vigilance.
“People often hold out until a safe point, like the holidays,” Meighan says. “Once they get there, their system collapses precisely because it finally can.”
What happens next is all too familiar for many:
- the adrenaline drop, which can leave people exhausted, weepy or ill
- deferred emotions rising because the brain finally feels safe enough to release them
- a cognitive hangover, where the mind struggles to shift gears and feels numb or flat
This is what some call the “December Mirror”, the moment when all the emotions and unmet needs that have been shelved for 12 months finally demand attention.
It’s no coincidence that people who have been “quietly cracking” are 6.2 times more likely to burn out, a statistic that mirrors what Meighan sees every year.
“Stopping signals safety,” she explains. “But that can look like tears, irritability or total shutdown before rest actually begins.”
Shane adds: When stress responses are frequently activated, such as from overly anxious behaviour, it can prevent the body from fully recovering and result in emotional exhaustion.
The shift toward conscious recovery
There is a growing cultural shift away from numbing and toward conscious recovery, healing the root causes rather than escaping them.
“Trauma-informed recovery focuses on safety and understanding why the coping behaviour developed,” Meighan says. “Removing the behaviour alone often leaves someone vulnerable. Recovery is about building resilience, not just stopping drinking or working too much.”
True recovery, she says, is not stepping away from life, but “building a life you don’t need to escape from.”
It’s also deeply personal:
- recognising red flags early
- naming overwhelm without judgement
- practising self-compassion
- building sustainable coping tools
- asking for support before collapse, not after
“And for someone reading this who recognises themselves, recognising these patterns early can prevent escalation,” Meighan adds, “the first gentle step is simply noticing what’s happening. Acknowledge you’re overwhelmed and deserve care. That awareness is the foundation for change.”
The festive season will always ask something of us. But as more Australians recognise the emotional cost of running on empty, a new wellbeing movement is emerging: one centred in compassion, prevention, and understanding what our bodies and minds have been trying to tell us all year.
Byron Private is an integrated, trauma-informed recovery centre helping individuals with complex lives restore balance and resilience through personalised, evidence-based clinical care for mental health and addiction.
