2 hours ago
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We’ve received enough school jobs (C8) to keep us employed forever, yet, it’s time to give it a rest, but not before these final few missives, starting with feedback for former Sawdust Monitor Warren Howlett: “I’m sure baby boomers recall sidestepping piles of sawdust covering the ubiquitous student spews along corridors and stairwells at school?” says Peter Snowden of Orange. “Classrooms seemed immune as teachers always reminded kids to ‘do the bolt’ if they were going to be crook. I blame the warm milk forced upon us daily in primary years. Still can’t front it as a drink except in my flat white or with Tia Maria, of course.”
Chris Lockley of Alstonville agrees that dodgy milk is the culprit but blames it on “the Milk Monitor playing their trick of planting sour milk in the daily supply.” We’re looking at you, Mark Berg.
“Speaking of sawdust, does anyone remember the local butcher having a layer of sawdust sprinkled on their shop floor?” asks Viv Munter of Tumbi Umbi. “Is that still a thing? We loved a trip to the local butcher when we were kids for the smell and the chance of a pink musk Lifesaver from his apron pocket.”
We can’t think of a better sign-off on the subject than this offering from Seppo Ranki of Glenhaven: “The school job no one wanted to have in Mr Owens’ class at Cowra Primary in 1960-61 was to place a red pill from his top drawer under his tongue if he keeled over. Luckily in my two years with him, he didn’t.”
“Fortunately for Nicolas Harrison (C8), alcohol-free days only last while the sun is up,” observes Peter Miniutti of Ashbury. Evan Bailey of Glebe revisits our cheap wine thread from August in suggesting Nicolas check the cellar for some Blue Nun: “Always left at parties, but never consumed, thus giving him free alcohol.”
Lionel Latoszek of Long Jetty says, “mention of Peter Stuyvesant (C8) reminded me that my younger self researched skunks, after hearing of one ‘stinking to high heaven’ in the song Dead Skunk by Louden Wainwright III. Louden is a descendant of Stuyvesant. The research, in a battered school library encyclopaedia, also explained why the skunk stinks alive or dead and why to never approach one from behind.”
“Questions must be asked in Portugal,” demands Stewart Copper of Maroubra. “Okay, own up. Who pissed off the Orcas?”
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Include name, suburb and daytime phone.
