Jokes about boys and a banned porn star aren’t ‘edgy’. It’s exploitation

November 25, 2025 — 3.30pm

There’s a moment every parent of a young man has, usually somewhere between his 16th and 25th birthday, when you look at him, look at his mates, and suddenly realise just how vulnerable boys really are. They swagger, they posture, they act worldly, but underneath, they’re still kids trying to figure out masculinity, sexuality, identity and self-worth in a world that’s getting more complicated (and sexualised) by the day.

Bonnie Blue was so offensive that even OnlyFans, the YouTube of subscriber porn, terminated her account.Credit: Rob Parfitt / Channel 4

Which brings me to the Bonnie Blue phenomenon. For those who don’t know, she’s the English pornographic stunt-person who had sex with more than 1000 men in a single day, and who is known for filming sexual content with university students. She was, umm, so offensive that even OnlyFans, the YouTube of subscriber porn, terminated her account.

Blue represents a deeply troubling cultural moment – when sexualised content targeting young men is glamorised as an ecosystem of entertainment. The behaviour she promotes is seen by many as reckless, exploitative and socially corrosive, reducing boys to props and punchlines.

Sure. She can do what she likes. But this is about the cultural machine that has turned a woman known for sexual content – targeted towards the young – into a kind of folk hero among teenage boys and twenty-something blokes wearing T-shirts emblazoned with “I (heart emoji) Bonnie Blue” as if it’s an achievement. Or a personality trait. Or, worse, a badge of honour.

Let’s call it what it is: a disturbing celebration of predatory sexual dynamics disguised as banter. Blue attempted to visit Australia this year for schoolies-adjacent appearances, and rightly, her visa was revoked. She headed to Bali instead.

Because somewhere in the system, someone recognised what parents like me see instantly: this isn’t empowerment, education or humour. This is sexualisation marketed directly at boys who don’t yet have fully formed boundaries, experience or emotional defences. And the worst part? They’re buying into it with T-shirts, embarrassing bragging rights, memes and embarrassing bravado.

I don’t say this as some kind of creepy Karen. God forbid. I say this as a mother who has spent decades working in media, lifestyle, entertainment and pop culture. I’ve seen trends come and go. I’ve seen scandals. I’ve seen provocateurs. But there is a difference – a huge difference – between adult sexuality and the public glorification of using sexually inexperienced boys for content or career momentum.

And how have we ended up in a world where a Gold Coast condom shop selling Bonnie Blue fan-merch to teens is seen as hilarious?

It’s not hilarious. It’s horrifying. My anger isn’t directed solely at one woman. It’s at the ecosystem – the online platforms, merch companies, retailers, and yes, the young men themselves – that have turned sexual exploitation into a brand aesthetic.

The conversation we’re not having loudly enough is this: boys can be victims of sexual culture too. They can be manipulated. I’m not here to moralise. I’m here to say that celebrating someone for sexualising young men isn’t edgy, progressive or empowering. It’s gross. It’s dangerous. And it’s time we stop pretending it’s just a joke.

There are many things parents are willing to tolerate but what most can’t take is watching young men parade around in Bonnie Blue T-shirts like it’s some kind of Olympic medal for being sexually clueless.

This is not empowerment. It’s predatory sex turned into merch. The cognitive dissonance is Olympic-level. As a mum, I look at my son and his generation – boys trying to navigate adulthood in a world where sexual attention is currency – and I feel sick. Some of these boys aren’t “in on the joke”. They are the joke. And half of them don’t even realise the punchline is at their expense.

We’ve somehow entered a universe where a woman sexually targeting young men is treated as edgy entertainment. Where boys bragging about being “used” is seen as banter. And let me say the thing no one seems to want to say: If the genders were reversed, this wouldn’t just be controversial; it would be criminal.

There would be national outrage. Front-page headlines. A Current Affair investigations and Four Corners specials. A senate inquiry. But when it’s young men? “Oh, relax, boys love it. It’s funny”.

This is a moment where we need to stop, breathe, and ask: What the hell are we endorsing here? Because if this is the culture we’re handing our sons, we shouldn’t be surprised when they grow into men who have no understanding of healthy boundaries, respect, or self-worth.

The Bonnie Blue phenomenon isn’t just gross, it’s a flashing neon billboard screaming: “Your sons deserve better than this.“

And I am not staying quiet while our boys are turned into hideous content. Imagine how that could play out when “the boys” are consolidating their careers.

Melissa Hoyer is a cultural and social commentator.

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