‘I’m triggered!’: Why this Aussie actor can never take a date to the beach

Each week, Benjamin Law asks public figures to discuss the subjects we’re told to keep private by getting them to roll a die. The numbers they land on are the topics they’re given. This week, he talks to multi-award-winning actor, dancer and singer-songwriter Keiynan Lonsdale. The 34-year-old is best known for his roles in Dance Academy, The Flash and Love, Simon.

POLITICS

Politics are essentially about values. What are yours and where did you get them?
My values come from the way I grew up – living with a single mum in government housing in North St Marys [in Western Sydney]. She had three jobs and raised us on her own. She taught me to accept everybody, no matter where they come from or their class. So I believe that we are equal and all deserve love, housing, shelter, food and respect. And second chances.

Do you feel that we’re less inclined to give each other second chances nowadays?
Casting stones is very human: we’re always quick to judge. But I think every single person would love a second chance, and the opportunity to reflect on being better and grow. If you don’t give that to people, the narrative never changes.

You’ve previously said that you didn’t always see yourself represented in Australian arts and media. How much of your decision to move to America in your 20s was because of that?
I mean, I remember seeing two Black Australians on [local] TV growing up, but I always felt very inspired watching American content because of all their Black entertainers. I thought, “One day, I’m going to create that here – or be part of that here.” So I can’t tell you how much joy it gave me when I did come back [to Australia] a few years ago. A lot has shifted. What’s hilarious is that since coming back to Australia, I’ve had other Black actors I’ve worked with say, “You were the first Black Australian I saw in a TV show.”

MONEY

You’ve mentioned growing up in government housing with a single mum. Am I right to assume that money was tight?
It was extremely tight and extremely stressful.

What do you remember of the stress?
Going to the grocery store was traumatising, actually. We had a lot of pride in our family and we’re very strong, but there was a lot of pain around money. It was embarrassing when we’d get to the checkout and we’d have to send stuff back because we just couldn’t afford it. Then you’ve got me begging to be sent to dance school so I can become Michael Jackson [laughs]! But then, as a teen, I got this scholarship to this performing-arts high school. Suddenly, most kids in my school are rich and I’m exposed to wealth for the first time.

How much of your past – growing up without money – has been a motivator to work hard? Is there a relationship between the two?
One hundred per cent. My goal, as a kid, was to get my mum a house – to be the best performer so we could eat whatever we wanted. And that’s what I did.

Wow.
I got her an apartment, I got her a car, I got myself a house. It wasn’t until I was in my house in Los Angeles and I had all this money that I’d realised what I’d done.

What are your criteria for saying yes and no to work nowadays?
It needs to tick two of three boxes: fun, growth and money. For me, taking on this role [in The Normal Heart, at the Sydney Theatre Company] was a hands-down “yes”. I’ve not done theatre like this before and it’s a beautiful story. For me, growth is wealth.

BODIES

You’re the classic triple threat: actor, singer, dancer. Is there anything you cannot do with your body that you wish you could?
I can’t float.

Wait, really?
Everyone’s like, “Oh, don’t worry. I’ll teach you.” I’m like, “Well, I’m 34 and not one of the hundred people who’ve said that to me has successfully taught me how to float.” [Laughs] The ocean loves me so much he just wants to take me down.

If you’re caught in a rip, the official advice is float for as long as you can. But it sounds as if you’d be f***ed.
Yeah, that’s so Australian. [Puts on thick Aussie accent] “Just float!” But I’m like, “I can’t”. The other thing is, it gets me very angry.

Swimming makes you angry?
Yeah! My body uses too much energy to do something very simple. I start to just get really pissed off. I’ve had to realise I shouldn’t bring anyone I’m romantically interested in with me to the beach early on because I’ll be a total arsehole. I’m triggered!

When do you feel most comfortable in your skin?
Dancing on stage.

When do you feel least comfortable in your skin?
Swimming or riding a bike.

So you’re not going to do a triathlon?
Nope!

What is the superpower that you wish you had?
Clarity of communication: helping people understand others’ points of view.

What superpower do you have?
I’ve been told by other guys, mostly straight guys, that I’ve allowed them to soften more into who they are, helped them feel more comfortable. [Lonsdale came out as gay in 2022.]

Are you self-conscious about any aspect of your body?
I’ve always suffered with a bit of acne. At the moment, I’m struggling with it on my back, so I get very self-conscious taking my shirt off in public settings and on stage. I don’t know what I’m trying to say. I think it’s be kind to yourself. Perfection is sold to us at such a high rate. I don’t want scars and acne and shit on my back, but I’ve got it. But ultimately, these are tiny, tiny, tiny things in comparison to what people go through. Be grateful for the stuff you’ve got.

Keiynan Lonsdale will appear in Sydney Theatre Company’s The Normal Heart from February 9 to March 14.

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