1 month ago
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I used to go to the beach with just my towel and bathers but after having kids I began to worry about protecting their skin from the sun and along with decking them out in rashies, hats and sunscreen I started investigating shade options.
Back in the day, the choice was a beach umbrella or a beach igloo. The umbrellas are notoriously flighty, one gust of wind and they can spiral down the beach like an out-of-control javelin potentially impaling other beachgoers.
The beach igloos are little hot boxes with the three covered sides attracting the heat and blocking others’ views of the beach. While easy to put up, beach igloos are also a nightmare to put down and trying to wrestle them back into their case at the end of the day is a regular contortionist act.
CoolCabanas on the beach in Lorne. Credit: Justin McManus
Then along came the CoolCabana, an ingenious invention: part umbrella, part tent.
The addition of “legs” on the umbrella structures that can be filled with sand means these cabanas can withstand most gusts of wind and the lack of sides means the structures do not block anyone’s view of the beach.
They are easy to put up and put down and pack away into a thin bag you can sling over one shoulder.
We bought one immediately. At first, our family’s cabana was one of the few on the beach, friends used to be able to spot us easily and would come and hover in its shade and put their gear underneath our tent. Then eventually they grew in popularity and our friends became so enamoured with the joy of the cabana that they bought their own.
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I only wish there was some sort of affiliate program.
Now the beach at Lorne and at other seaside towns around the country are full of cabanas.
On hot days beachgoers dash from the shade of one cabana to the other avoiding the scorching sand on bare feet.
But despite their popularity I have never seen anyone unable to sit on the beach because there are too many cabanas. Instead, I see families and friends neatly lining up the cabanas in orderly rows so they are easy to see between and walk around.
Cabana etiquette is deployed with the cabanas lined up starting from the back of the beach so as to avoid obstructing any beach views.
The cabanas could even be said to stop people from sprawling out all over the beach, instead containing their family or friendship group to a small 2-metre by 2-metre patch of shade.
Over the past two weeks I have, on a regular basis, committed the ultimate sin of setting up my cabana and then leaving it unoccupied for a period of time.
Even prime minister Anthony Albanese weighed in on the debate last summer saying that using cabanas to secure prime beach real estate is “not on”.
“[The beach] is a place where every Australian is equal,” he said. “And that’s a breach of that principle, really, to think that you can reserve a little spot as just yours.”
BT described it as “absolute pandemonium” in the morning in Lorne, with people running to erect their cabanas.
“At 7.30 there are several hundred cabanas on the beach, every carpark on the beach carpark and up on the main road is chockas,” he says. “I look around and the town is f---ing deserted, there is not one person because they have all been down, stolen the land and retreated back to their house for breakfast and further sleep then they roll up at midday after reserving the beach for half the day and they are not even there.”
Give us a break.
It’s fair to say leaving “ghost cabanas” set up on the beach until midday while you go back to bed is pretty selfish, but let’s not assume the worst of all cabana dwellers. I only wish I was still sleeping, but instead I set up a cabana when I arrive at the beach and then spend part of the morning as one of the volunteer helpers for the Surf Life Saving club’s Nippers program.
During this time, my cabana serves as a place to keep our beach gear and house any child who needs a break while I am chasing a group of small children around the beach, a role similar to herding cats.
I return to the cabana occasionally for sunscreen reapplication or to locate missing goggles but eventually once Nippers is over, I’m back there, somewhat bewildered that a beach tent is inspiring so much anger.
Rather than turning on cabana owners, we should be petitioning the government to hand out the tents for free as a down payment on future savings to our healthcare system.
Instead of “Slip, Slop, Slap” it could be “Slip, Slop, Slap and Set up a cabana”.
I’ll be pondering this and the other big questions in life under the welcome shade of my cabana.
Cara Waters is the city editor for The Age.
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