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Australia’s fragile batting has proven Stuart Broad right, allowing England’s Bazballers to blast a $10 million revenue hole through Cricket Australia’s coffers and dash local hopes for an Ashes whitewash with their first win on these shores in 15 years.
The Barmy Army was singing in the aisles when umpire Kumar Dharmasena tapped his leg for the winning runs at 5.24pm on Saturday, snapping a run of 18 games in Australia without victory in front of a bumper day two crowd of 92,045.
Captain Ben Stokes applauds the English fans.Credit: AP
Fittingly, Broad was on the Seven telecast to call the winning runs, which sealed captain Ben Stokes and Joe Root’s first Test victory in Australia. The pair walked towards England’s supporter group in bay 13 to acknowledge their support after belatedly rewarding them for their loyalty with a four-wicket win.
“Sixteen painful losses and two draws since England last won a Test match on these shores, look what it means to those fans, who have gone all the way around the world to see this England team,” Broad said.
“I think of Ben Stokes, I think of Joe Root – players who have been through everything here in Australia throughout their Test match careers. They deserve it. Ben Stokes has been a warrior throughout this whole series. He deserves to win a Test match in Australia.”
England’s run chase was far from convincing but at no stage did they appear in danger of botching it after openers Zak Crawley and Ben Duckett swiped 51 runs from the target of 175 in a whirlwind opening stand.
Scott Boland was the most threatening of Australia’s pacemen but was not introduced into the attack until the 11th over when England already had 70 on the board.
Christmas week started with the blowtorch firmly on England’s off-field antics and will finish with the microscope on Australia’s willow-wielders and the MCG’s seamer’s paradise, which produced just the 27th two-day Test in the format’s 148-year and 2615-game history.
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With more than 90,000 expected to have come for day three, the early finish will cost CA $10 million in lost revenue, according to a source with knowledge of the matter.
The joke was on Broad after the team he branded the worst since 2010 retained the urn in just 11 days, but Australia’s pantomime Ashes villain had reason to sport a grin from ear to ear on Saturday night.
This was Australia’s first defeat to England at home since the Sydney Test in January 2011 when a third innings humiliation sparked a root and branch review into the national team.
Back then, Smith, the stand-in captain in this game, was a wide-eyed 21-year-old yet to score a Test hundred who had been brought into the Australian XI to inject fun and laughter into a demoralised team, an injured Ricky Ponting was nominally the Test captain and Julia Gillard was the prime minister in a minority government.
While it was a weakened Australia attack that felt the wrath of England’s smash and grab approach this time, the blame for the defeat should be carried by their batters.
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Presented with the opportunity to bat England out of the game, Australia crumbled for the second time in as many days, losing 8-71 in 107 balls.
Though Australia have the urn safely in their keeping, the batting remains a major problem, as it has been for the best part of two years.
Only three of the team’s top seven – Travis Head, Steve Smith and Alex Carey – are averaging above 40 this series or playing in a manner that demands automatic selection.
Recalled for this series after a hot run at domestic level, Marnus Labuschagne’s twin failures in Melbourne resulted in him finishing 2025 with an average of 20.84, the lowest in a calendar year by a top-four Australia batter since 1981.
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Veteran Usman Khawaja took the gloss off his revival in Adelaide by falling for a second-ball duck with an ungainly pull shot to the pace of Josh Tongue.
Cameron Green, the only other Australian to reach double figures, did little to lock away his place for the Sydney Test, losing his wicket to an uncomfortable fend well outside off stump.
Head combined enterprising, but not reckless, strokeplay with sound defence for 46, and Smith trusted his technique for an unbeaten 24, but the others could neither score nor survive for long enough to make it count.
Unlike earlier this series, there was no bailout from Carey or the tail.
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