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In 1986 I was fortunate to survive being pinned under a reversing garbage truck. While I lay on the road trapped and labouring to breathe, an off-duty nurse stayed by me and helped slow my panicked breathing. In such a moment there is deep gratitude for a non-anxious presence.
The Latin root of “solace” derives from the Latin noun solacium, which means consolation or comfort in times of distress. Poet David Whyte says: “Solace is what we must look for when the mind cannot bear the pain, the loss or suffering that eventually touches every life and every endeavour; when people we know and love disappear, when hope must take a different form than the one we have shaped for it.”
Solace, a walk-through sculpture overlooking Geelong’s Corio Bay, offers a contemplative space for those grieving after road accidents.
People look for solace and hope in myriad ways and places: the natural world offers space for healing, as do spiritual and religious practices. Being listened to is key, whether in formal counselling, rehabilitation or support groups. In times of vulnerability, the kindness of family, friends and strangers can never be underestimated.
The third Sunday of November is World Day of Remembrance for Road Traffic Victims. Globally it is estimated 1.2 million people die annually, with up to 20 times that number seriously injured. Victoria’s Amber Community, a non-profit that offers free counselling, recognises the need for solace in various forms. An annual Time for Remembering ceremony, now in its 25th year, is held in Parliament House. This event is an occasion to commemorate loved ones who have either died or been injured on our roads. Story and song are central. On one occasion, the choir sang Paul Kelly’s rendition of Psalm 23, Meet Me In The Middle of the Air. People bring photos of loved ones and there is a time for candle lighting.
A range of petitions seeks hope and offers prayers for those impacted by road trauma. Health and healing services, carers, emergency services personnel, law makers, witnesses and the community at large are all acknowledged.
Solace is also the name given to Victoria’s road trauma memorial. Overlooking Corio Bay, Geelong, this beautiful set of sculptures in seven parts, depicts phases of the moon’s cycle. These represent the experience of grief and range of emotions associated with road trauma. The semicircular shape and layout invite visitors to move through the space, in addition to sitting quietly.
Whyte again. “Solace is not meant to be an answer, but an invitation, through the door of pain and difficulty, to the depth of suffering and simultaneous beauty in the world that the strategic mind by itself cannot grasp nor make sense of.”
As my injuries stabilised over the years, a deep and abiding appreciation developed for the sources of healing and the nurse’s initial solace.
Andy Calder is a Uniting Church minister.
