Singapore’s secret, absurd restaurant lives up to its name

One coffee shop in Singapore is unlike the others.

The historic neighbourhood Jalan Besar (which translates to big or wide road) is speckled with art deco buildings, colourful shophouses, restaurants and bars. Yet, I can safely say no other shop along this eclectic stretch is as ludicrous as the one I find myself at now.

Asylum Coffeehouse’s minimalist, bland white appearance is a part-time facade. Cafe by day, the unassuming corner shop becomes a portal to the multiverse by night.

Hidden within is Absurdities, a restaurant serving a six-course omakase-style meal over two hours. The twist? Each course is served in a different themed room, each space kookier than the last. And as kooky as the spaces are, so too are the dishes; each course is not what you think it is.

The concept was developed by husband-and-wife duo Stuart Wee and Emily Png, who’ve forged a reputation for their immersive dining experiences in Singapore. Absurdities – their multi-room restaurant – was borne out of the pandemic. The self-styled “anti-fine dining, fun dining” experience became a hit with locals during border closures, perhaps filling a travel-sized hole. The multiverse-themed restaurant is pitched as a gastronomic adventure filled with intrigue and inspiration.

A passing pedestrian would be none the wiser as to what is surely one of Singapore’s most unusual dining concepts. Directions to the restaurant are shared 24 hours before your reservation; only past and present patrons are privy to its existence on the bustling street.

I arrive solo, minutes before my 6.30pm booking. A group of mature ladies sit along benches outside, cheerfully talking among themselves. Another woman in her early 20s sits alone; she’s soon to be my dining companion in a group of six.

An attendant greets us outside the coffeehouse, which is now occupied by a half-dozen people, none of who are seeking a caffeine hit.

The staff member takes our drink orders, successfully distracting us from the movements inside. Minutes later, the six of us are ushered in; the previous diners, nowhere to be seen. A welcome cocktail – served in a chalice – helps ease us into unfamiliar territory. Staff members, in exuberant attire, deliver a rundown of the night. This will be no regular mealtime; it’s time to leave the world as we know it behind.

With drinks emptied, an attendant reveals the way to the dining multiverse, opening a veiled pantry door behind the cafe’s countertop. Clever.

I’m the first to navigate a moody, narrow corridor covered in floor-to-wall mirrors and illuminated with strips of electric-blue light. Cackles sound behind me as I make my way through the trippy, Instagrammable chamber, now flashing rainbow. Locating the door to our first course takes me a while – but perhaps that’s part of the fun. Then I enter the room. What the?

It’s the first of many nonsensical rooms and theatrical platings; Absurdities lives up to its name.

A man dressed as a zebra waits under a big tree in a dim, rose-lit jungle. Sitting under drooping vines, our host enthusiastically describes “Tree of Old”, the room’s gnarled trunk centrepiece, while serving crowd-pleasing burgers. I can barely tell the burger is missing a thick slab of beef – it’s meatless. It’s delicious. So are the charcoal tapioca fries it’s served with.

Other realms feature witchcraft, barren lands and haute midair adventures, to describe a few. Yet not all are easy to enter.

We crawl on all fours through a dark cupboard to enter a retro ’50s-style American kitchen. Think pink cabinetry, green-and-white checkerboard tiles, and vibrant mid-century furnishings. The kitchen is flanked with spoof Cornflakes boxes along the walls – a clue to the most topsy-turvy meal of the night: chicken pot pie disguised as a bowl of cereal. It even has that Cornflakes crunch.

A host, dressed like a 1950s housewife in a blue polka-dot dress and apron, charms us with her banter and mock American drawl while we eat this faux breakfast. Or is it dinner?

Yep, this cafe really isn’t like the others.

The details

Flights
Singapore Airlines flies to Singapore from Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Cairns, Adelaide, Darwin and Perth. See singaporeair.com

Tour
Absurdities offers a six-course meal with two alcoholic drinks from $S203 ($239). See absurdities.com.sg

The writer was a guest of Absurdities and the Singapore Tourism Board.

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