English is tough. Can’t you C?

3 hours ago 4

“As my Ukrainian sons continue to improve their English, one of the main sticking points is the letter ‘C’ and its various pronunciations,” says Chris Keane of Seattle, USA. “Including reading eye charts for a perplexed optometrist, where they both said ‘S’ every time there was a ‘C’. Paula Gard’s mention of Cedar Court (C8) reminds me of the time we came across ‘Pacific Ocean’. My younger son threw up his hands and stormed off, yelling ‘English is stupid!’”

Hurling (C8) is for lightweights, according to Jock Brodie of Port Macquarie: “Before the young took up lawn bowls, my father assured me it was the most dangerous sport in the world. More people died while playing it than any other sport.”

“I hear the NSW opposition leader’s PA is known in her office as the Sloane Arranger,” reports Andrew Taubman of Queens Park. “Sorry if that Triggers anyone.”

Graeme Finn of Campsie “once heard the term ‘Sunbeams’ to refer to dinnerware that was not tarnished by food after a meal and did not require washing up. Are there other terms?”

“Can Granny confirm or deny the rumour that there was a university course in town planning that sent its students to Noosa to learn how to thoroughly bamboozle visitors with roundabouts (C8) and signage designs,” asks Toby Waters of Emerald Beach. “And is it true that the course collapsed as too few students could successfully navigate their way out?”

“Many years ago, I was in Siena heading, by car, to Rome,” writes Bruce Hyland of Woy Woy. “After passing the same ‘Rome’ sign twice, I decided on a different direction and found myself in a series of narrowing and steepening streets, culminating in a T-junction that my car couldn’t negotiate (I was driving a Cadillac convertible at the time), much to the amusement of the coffee drinkers on the corner, a number of whom left their coffees, picked up the rear end of the car and turned it into the cross street so that I could continue on, with much hand-waving and shouts of ‘Grazie’ from my wife and me. Without these helping hands, I’d probably still be searching for the well-concealed Rome road out of town.”

“I’ve found the answer to the question, ‘At what age do I become an old woman?’,” declares Nedra Orme of North Sydney. “The answer? When your youngest child applies for her Seniors Card.”

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